My mom likes to give nicknames to people who's names she can't remember. This obviously doesn't include her close friends but it does include people who have more of an acquaintance status. She refers to them solely by their nicknames allowing situations like this to happen:
*conversation about property taxes*
Mom's Friend: I heard that they are going to lower property taxes in general
Mom: No No, I heard the opposite
Mom's Friend: From whom?
Mom: The Panda told me
Mom's Friend : *WTF Face*
Me: *Face Palm*
Mom: Oh come on you know who I'm talking about ..... THE PANDA!!!!!
Monday, 11 November 2013
Sunday, 3 November 2013
Living in Style with Oscar De Le Renta!
So this one happened a while ago, and I shared it on Facebook but not my blog.
Mom: *on the phone with a friend* Yeah I bought two pairs of pajamas in Costco for only $17, and they are Oscar de la Renta!
ME:*overhears and gets excited*OMG OMG we own something from Oscar de la Renta?!?!?! That's so exciting!!! Too bad its not a dress
Mom: *ends phone convo, turns to me* We can't afford an Oscar de la Renta dress, we will settle for pajamas.
ME: Isn't the Russian philosophy that "the point of wearing brand names is that other people know you wear them". No one sees what brand your pajama is....
Mom: Don't worry I'll tell them
LOL
#pajamainstyle
Mom: *on the phone with a friend* Yeah I bought two pairs of pajamas in Costco for only $17, and they are Oscar de la Renta!
ME:*overhears and gets excited*OMG OMG we own something from Oscar de la Renta?!?!?! That's so exciting!!! Too bad its not a dress
Mom: *ends phone convo, turns to me* We can't afford an Oscar de la Renta dress, we will settle for pajamas.
ME: Isn't the Russian philosophy that "the point of wearing brand names is that other people know you wear them". No one sees what brand your pajama is....
Mom: Don't worry I'll tell them
LOL
#pajamainstyle
Sunday, 13 October 2013
Helping your Mom with Homework!
What's more fun than staying up till 1 am writing your essay? staying up till 1 am writing your MOM'S essay as she dictates it to you in Russian and having to translate....
To be fair I'm super proud of her for working full time, and taking classes, especially since writing essays is difficult when English is your third language.
To be fair I'm super proud of her for working full time, and taking classes, especially since writing essays is difficult when English is your third language.
Thursday, 26 September 2013
Abercrombie & Fitch Dilema
A while ago my mom and I were shopping in the US
Mom: Look 40% off at Abercrombie & Fitch, I want a T-shirt.
Me: OK
*Browsing* My mom notices that the Plain T-shirts with no logo cost $5, and the T-shirts with the Abercrombie & Fitch written across the front are $15*
Mom: $15 for a T-shirt?!?!?!
Me: There are other T-shirts for $5
Mom: What is the point of an Abercrombie & Fitch T-shirt if it doesn't say "Abercrombie and Fitch" on it? That's just a regular T-shirt! ...... I mean its not like their good quality, whats the point of buying them?
Me: Believe it or not some people don't like to have the brand name across their chest
Mom: Then what's the point of having a brand?
Grandma: Yes! you can buy a cheaper and better quality plain T-shirt ... that is NOT half sea-through mid you, and just TELL everyone its A&F..... cut off the "no name" label and say it was itchy.
Mom: Look 40% off at Abercrombie & Fitch, I want a T-shirt.
Me: OK
*Browsing* My mom notices that the Plain T-shirts with no logo cost $5, and the T-shirts with the Abercrombie & Fitch written across the front are $15*
Mom: $15 for a T-shirt?!?!?!
Me: There are other T-shirts for $5
Mom: What is the point of an Abercrombie & Fitch T-shirt if it doesn't say "Abercrombie and Fitch" on it? That's just a regular T-shirt! ...... I mean its not like their good quality, whats the point of buying them?
Me: Believe it or not some people don't like to have the brand name across their chest
Mom: Then what's the point of having a brand?
Grandma: Yes! you can buy a cheaper and better quality plain T-shirt ... that is NOT half sea-through mid you, and just TELL everyone its A&F..... cut off the "no name" label and say it was itchy.
Monday, 2 September 2013
getting arrested vs. hurting grandma's feelings ... Tough Choice!
So for the first time, here is a GRANDMA story :)
Grandma: Do you want some wine? [Her home-made wine]
me: no
Grandma: WHY?!? your grandfather and I made it.
me: I'm DRIVING
Grandma: that's ok my wine has no alcohol *explains process of how it was made*
me: I took organic chem that definitely has alcohol, you just explained the process of fermentation!
Grandma: are you really gonna hurt my feelings and not try any?
me: * face-palm* babushka, I'm picturing explaining this to a police officer and its not looking good!
Grandma: Do you want some wine? [Her home-made wine]
me: no
Grandma: WHY?!? your grandfather and I made it.
me: I'm DRIVING
Grandma: that's ok my wine has no alcohol *explains process of how it was made*
me: I took organic chem that definitely has alcohol, you just explained the process of fermentation!
Grandma: are you really gonna hurt my feelings and not try any?
me: * face-palm* babushka, I'm picturing explaining this to a police officer and its not looking good!
Tuesday, 20 August 2013
Being Disorganized - A serious afliction
After a lengthy conversation about something I forgot to do
Mom: You are so disorganized! What did I ever do to deserve such a disorganized child?!?
Me: *trying to lighten the mood* At least I'm not an alcoholic :)
Mom: You know, there are some very smart, organized, and high functioning alcoholics.
Me: Their organization skills are not a result of their addiction....
Mom: I know, they just got very lucky
Me: *rolls eyes* That's a matter of perspective
Moral of the story: Organization is a highly important skill that can help one overcome any situation. AKA I can't be an alcoholic because I would be bad at it :P
Mom: You are so disorganized! What did I ever do to deserve such a disorganized child?!?
Me: *trying to lighten the mood* At least I'm not an alcoholic :)
Mom: You know, there are some very smart, organized, and high functioning alcoholics.
Me: Their organization skills are not a result of their addiction....
Mom: I know, they just got very lucky
Me: *rolls eyes* That's a matter of perspective
Moral of the story: Organization is a highly important skill that can help one overcome any situation. AKA I can't be an alcoholic because I would be bad at it :P
Wednesday, 14 August 2013
Candy Crush promotes integrity.... WHO KNEW?
*Mom is playing Candy Crush while we are watching a TV show*
Mom: *looses her game* Damn it!
Me: *watching over her shoulder* Let me play for you! I'll pass that level for you.
Mom: *Disapproving tone* That's CHEATING!
Me: Mom it's a game....
Mom: But I play against my FRIENDS, its unfair if the score I get isn't mine, they work hard for their scores!
Me: So you have no problem bribing people in Vegas, but Candy Crush requires integrity?
Mom: I don't care about the hotel system in Vegas, but I care about my friends and their Candy Crush achievements.
Me: OK then...
Mom: Don't be that person who cheats at games, games are meant to be fun and honest, life isn't.
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| CANDY CRUSH: PROMOTING INTEGRITY AND HONESTY |
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