So for the first time, here is a GRANDMA story :)
Grandma: Do you want some wine? [Her home-made wine]
Grandma: WHY?!? your grandfather and I made it.
me: I'm DRIVING
Grandma: that's ok my wine has no alcohol *explains process of how it was made*
me: I took organic chem that definitely has alcohol, you just explained the process of fermentation!
Grandma: are you really gonna hurt my feelings and not try any?
me: * face-palm* babushka, I'm picturing explaining this to a police officer and its not looking good!